Having seen many examples of the disaster it becomes when a member spouse pushes, coerces, ultimatums the non-member spouse into being baptized, I have very assiduously steered clear of those methods from the start. I am a soon-to-be Surgeon's wife and my boyfriend and I have started discussing the changes that are going to happen when he enters his residency. The church is really good at putting on a happy, wholesome face to show the world, but if you look behind the curtain, you see that it's a despicable cult. You have been blessed with the equipment to make such decisions. Right off the bat, I have to admit that being married and committed to our marriage has been of utmost importance for my husband and I - throughout all of his training. We also do not allow harassment of those who post about being victims of rape, or who state that they are contemplating suicide. We have to show them we care. It has just made me realize that these formulas a lot of us Mormons learn growing up about how to have a happy marriage are, well, crap. The scenario where she refused to watch a possibly 'anti' documentary and wanted to watch church-sanctioned material sounds like a red flag.
I learned that you have to weigh thes things out--is it someone you care enough about to wait for. My youngest starts Kindergarten next fall. Hence the suspicious quotes around "adequately. Adore them and make them feel loved and appreciated. Yes, do sever the relationship. And after years of this struggle, will your love for him and desire to avoid the hassle cause you to reduce your activation. Or when I get up at 5: So far I have not brought up any of this with him because I'm trying to offer all of that support and space you mentioned and I wanted to give him the chance to do it himself. Honestly I'd let things keep going. Thanks again for the continued comments and replies to my edit.
She asked me not to contact her so that she could have the space she needed at this time. She wants the eternal temple marriage and you will be her long term project TL;DR I considered ending my marriage of Save yourself pain by getting out before it gets harder. Mormon theology is peculiar, yes, but the media frequently takes things out of context and misrepresents the religion. Much good luck, and keep us in the loop. This is because if your relationship gets serious and you guys get married, then she may have to forgo many of the customs of her religion. I would find it therapeutic to type out all of my feelings and at the same time he would get an update. Like it was mentioned above, see how she deals some of the issues now and if she can't handle it, it might be better to find someone else. If I were you, I would just nope out of it and move on. Mormon theology is pretty clear: But Mormon theology is also rich with opportunities for second chances. The church is really good at putting on a happy, wholesome face to show the world, but if you look behind the curtain, you see that it's a despicable cult.
Know there are a lot of Doctors who cheat though. That is a goal worth fighting for. Don't let her try to bring in the missionaries to explain; remind her that she is an RM and knows all they do and probably much more. I have been married to a doc for 31 years and just found out about an "emotional affair" that went on for 15 years she is a nurse. This post and the comments are an eye opener. Trust me, I too tried to make it work with my very Mormon also returned missionary ex-girlfriend. Children thrive on clarity and consistency. My 16 year old daughter told her Bishop who made that comment, that she thought her dad was great just the way he was. I hope he wised up. When she had a strict 6: If there was a disagreement, one person was supposed to submit to the other, consult a rulebook that covered almost everything, or turn to a church leader to decide for them.
